Welcome to Episode Two of the Courageous Living Show! In this episode, I talk about the 1st phase of courage: opening the gate.
If you are here and you found me, it’s probably because you’ve felt an impulse that it’s time to make a change, whether it be big or small, and possibly something that you’ve never done before.
And you’re looking for courage within yourself to do that.
Or you could also be looking for signs, or looking for some sort of guidance of what’s the right thing for you to do right now.
Usually when you’re just opening the gate of courage, you’re just at that starting point. This is kind of the time when you’re “researching” for what you want to do or where to take yourself going forward.
It’s not just an external research, it’s also an internal discovery for you.
There are four keys that I found when you’re opening the gate of courage.
I found these keys were present and consistent every time I’ve had to make really big decisions around what I would like to do next with my life.
The first key to opening the gate of courage is AWARENESS.
Awareness is all about self-discovery. It’s about understanding and shining a light on where you are right now either in all areas of your life or in just one area of your life.
The second key to opening the gate of courage is CURIOSITY.
You become curious around what brought that impulse along.
Curiosity is a really, really good friend at this particular stage because it opens up your mind to possibilities. It opens you up to allowing yourself to move forward with a specific change, even if it’s something that’s probably so out of character for you.
The third key to opening the gate of courage is ACCEPTANCE.
Acceptance is really important when you’re opening the gate of courage, because it’s important for you to be at peace and accept where you are right now.
When you accept where you are right now, it’s easier to move forward, instead of avoiding the fact and avoiding the issues of where you are.
When you accept, it makes everything a lot clearer for you. It shows to you what you need to do. It shows you where you need to understand a little bit more.
It just gives you a better feeling around your current circumstances. It allows you to ask the question, “What can I do with it?”
The fourth key to opening the gate of courage is COMPASSION.
Compassion is very key when you’re opening the gate of courage because compassion is your best friend at this time, as well as it’s going to be your best friend, as you start to build your courage and actually make that change in your life, as well as in sustaining that change in your life.
So let me give you an example of how I go through these four keys in my own life.
In 2006, I felt the impulse around moving my family from Manila in the Philippines to Australia. The impulse came from a sister-in-law I had back then because they were also moving and migrating to Australia.
I myself didn’t know anyone here. I didn’t have any family or friends that I knew at that time who were living here in Australia.
All I knew about Australia is that it would provide me so many more opportunities for myself.
So how did I apply the four keys of courage to what happened to me during then?
First of all, I shed light on how my family was doing back in Manila. Such as how much we were earning from our jobs, do we have our own home, how are my daughter’s doing there… They were only three years old and seven years old back then.
There’s definitely a big part of it also where I was financially forecasting what it’s going to be like since I had very young daughters back then.
I knew I would love for them to grow up with plenty of opportunities. And I knew I worked hard to provide whatever opportunities I can for them.
If I stayed in Manila, I also asked myself what did I need to do and what was possible there.
That’s where the Awareness Key all came into play.
The second key came in when I had to accept the not-so-good parts of my status back then, as well as the good ones too.
Back in the Philippines, I had so much support around me. My family was there. We had helpers. All of my friends from childhood were there as well and I had an established support system.
I also accepted that if I stayed there, there is only so much I can go for.
For example, I would love to travel. I think back then, I’ve only probably traveled once or twice in my life, and one of them was through work, because I could hardly afford to travel anywhere at all.
I had to accept that those were happening to me at that time, and it’s not about pitying myself but to be okay with where I am.
Curiosity came in when I needed to understand more of what its going to be like for me and my daughters if we did move to Australia.
I had to learn more about what the culture is like, what school is going to be like for my daughters, and so on and so forth.
My sister-in-law back then actually had a book about Australian culture and I perused that book to understand more about what its like to live here.
As I started to take more steps toward moving to Australia, I learned to become my own best friend.
I was ok with whatever limitations I had but I found ways to work through them. Even if it meant having to borrow money to afford the airfare going here to Australia (which I actually did).
I had to be compassionate to myself because that was how I was going to boost myself and know that I can do it.
I knew that by telling myself that yes it can be hard, but I can take it one step at a time and I’m learning as I go, then I know that I will make it through.
So I thought that I would share that because the four keys are very important.
When you open the gate of courage, there’s so much uncertainty. But on the other side, it’s beyond what you’ve experienced before.
Even a year before I felt that impulse, I never thought about living somewhere outside of or somewhere beyond Manila or beyond the Philippines.
But because I allowed myself to explore that impulse, it expanded my worldview. It expanded my life beyond anything that I thought was possible.
I find that that’s really why we want to open the gate of courage, because we have a natural impulse to live a full life. It’s what our souls are calling for.
Your soul is always calling you to expand. Your soul is always calling you to experience life in full. Because that’s what you came here for.
I hope that if you find yourself in a space where you feel that there’s an impulse but you feel like you’re being dragged down, that’s okay. But it’s also good to bring awareness that that’s what’s happening for you.
This is where introducing some new healthy habits for you is probably going to change the way you look at the world and the way you look at yourself. And as start you on an inward journey.
And that’s why there’s a big part of what I do is all about meditation, self-love and self-inquiry, because that’s where it all starts, it brings the unconscious conscious.
And when that happens for you and that happens for me. It just opens up you up to more possibility.
And that’s when it gets very very exciting!
I hope that you can remember to bring in the qualities of awareness of acceptance of curiosity and compassion if you are in a phase where you’re opening the gate of courage.
You are a whole that exists to live a life, not half a life.Kahlil Gibran